I woke up yesterday (Monday 03/23/20 Day 18 of quarantine) with the feeling that the air was heavy. I went to check on the news like I usually do, to try to understand what is going on, and I wanted to cry when I saw what was going on. I could not help to feel the despair in the air.
Somewhere back in time I used to feel a lot, I mean, I was born like this. I was born with a great amount of sensibility which that made me feel things around me, and a lot of times my way to express that was thru crying. To get a better picture on how much I cried, BOYS DON’T CRY was the song everyone sang to me. Over the years I did what pretty ever man was told to do; hold it in and hide your emotions. That is what I did for years, until I hit 23 years old I was extremely depress and going through one of the biggest crisis of my life. The day I smoke my last cigarette I wrote and signed a manifesto, that said pretty much this: “From this day 11/02/03 I promise to put my health and happiness in the first place and live with a purpose.” I signed and threw away a brand new pack of Parliament, and I started therapy. I started my own therapy and therapy with a psychologist.
I started my own therapy after watching Office Space (where a case of the mondays come from) and after I saw lot of things on the business world that was nasty (corruption), I realize I wan’t being true to myself. Because what I saw was not right. I decided to change and find something that I love doing and make it my career and I did. I started to race Ironman professionally and coaching athletes of all levels. That process was helping me reconnect with my true self, and it felt good. Yes, lots of ups and downs but it felt good. Made me feel alive again. My life was super simple compared with before, but I was making it and I was staying thru to myself and choosing love over any challenge that I had, and believe me I went through a lot of them. When I say challenge I mean LIFE, because there is always something.
Around 2013/14 another crisis broke up, because once again I was seeing a nasty side of professional sports. I am not talking only about doping, but also cheating in general, and that I was not willing to do, because was not compatible with my true self. So, I started to question things and I started to feel more and get to know myself even more.
When my son was born my ability to feel came back full force, and yesterday I felt the air super heavy, lots of confusion and anxiety. As the day went by I started to seethe nasty side of the whole corona virus and a huge amount of confusion.
Let’s pretend is a conspiracy, and if is true whoever created and executed a plan like that can only be a complete insane. For me, is hard to believe someone could do that. Honestly, I can’t imagine a human putting a go ahead on a plan like that. However, most likely there are people in the world that would do that.
If is a real virus, meaning not man made, it’s feels even crazier because it feels like we are back in the cold war. Also, we can clearly see that most “leaders” are willing to save the economy than actually people, and on top of that they are not willing to lower their benefits while most people lose theirs.
World painted blood
Yesterday after a lot of meditation, and music to help me feel reduce my anxiety, I realized the World is painted blood. Because on top of the corona virus pandemic people are fighting with each other,not only about the topics above but also about toilet paper and other supplies. This is a huge lack of love, empathy and compassion for me, and it feels likes the world is painted blood; and the media absolutely thrive on this blaming game.
In every crisis I went through in life I learned that went shit hits the fan people will show their true colors, the good, the bad and the ugly. It’s like the world is naked and afraid. Like I told my friend the other day when we were talking about that; right now what difference does it make if is a conspiracy or simply something that just happened? Knowing that, won’t stop you or your loved ones from catching the virus with the possibility of ending up in the hospital.
For me, crisis happens to makes us grow, and it’s part of life. I always believed we are here to grow, and seems like this is a collective challenge that is bringing out the good, the bad and the ugly in everyone. Now, with every crisis comes an opportunity, that being said we can remain the same and keep repeating the same mistakes again and again; or we can change and grow.
After I made the choice of love I have lived by the philosophy of being the change I wish to see in the world. I am not perfect in fact for a lot of people I am an asshole because sometimes I use sarcasm as self defense, and I can do that pretty well. I know I will not be perfect however, I try my best to not be an asshole daily.
With everything that is going on right now, I can’t stop thinking on what kind of world do we want to leave for our kids.Today, the corona virus is giving us an huge opportunity to be the change we wish to see in the world, which is the base of the philosophy I created called Rock-it-ology.
My thoughts can seem like utopia, but that does not change the fact that we treat each other like assholes. Using the theory of evolution we went from monkeys to monkeys with an existential crisis. That obviously includes me, and like I post before I have 40 years of existential crisis experience, I just didn’t talk about it. I may be a dream but I know I am not the only one.
Here is a quote from the one of the books I am writing:
“to be the change you wish to see in the world, is the most punk thing you will do in your life”Richard Wygand
Below you will find some of the songs I mention in this post!
Richard Wygand – The Punk Rocker Philosopher Dad.