Chapter 11: Be a punk
When I first step on a stage exclusively to sing a song I was almost 40 years old. Not going to lie, I was nervous as fuck of course because any artist would be, the same way I was nervous for all my ironmans. However this time was different, I was in fear. Fear because all of that had a meaning to me, like a metaphor. But thanks to weed, I able to chill and thanks to coffee I had the energy to do it as well. Which by that way, I just learned this is called Hippie speed ball! LOL!
The metaphor is simple, singing represents gaining my voice. So, in a way that show was my step out of depression something I have been dealing with for a long time now. Something that started around 7 years old with guilt, that I carried for years without even realizing. Anyways, that is a long story that became a book. Now, there is a sentence in the song I sang “all apologies by nirvana ” that really touch my soul: “Everything is my fault”. That explains everything in depression, at least in my depression. For ages, I really thought everything was my fault, and I never even had a chance to defend myself. I had no voice, I couldn’t speak, I was afraid of speaking. Now, I can recognize and deal with it using my “voice”. So yeah, that was a huge night for me, and I was only able to do so because I am a punk.
I have so many reasons why I needed to step in that stage and rock. Truth being said I was only able to do so because I am a punk and that is why I teach my kids to be punks. Funny thing is, when I said that only a few people got it because nobody really know what it means to be a punk.
First, being a punk is about being authentic, being true to yourself and embracing who you truly are. Quite simple!
Second, is about following your dreams. Nothing to do with money, I mean your real dreams, you know, the dreams of your heart. That sparkle of light that we all have inside. That something that makes your soul light up! (Note: sometimes might be a real dream)
Third, being a punk is recognizing that we are all souls. I mean we are very similar in the biological level, however in the soul level we are all unique. We all have something to learn and something to teach in this life.
Now you just have to keep in mind is that life will challenge you no matter what, so you can either enjoy the ride by following your dreams (heart) or you can make the challenge of life miserably challenging. I choose to follow my dreams. For example, I have been wanting to do my philosophical YouTube channel show but never had the balls, so this week I finally launched the coffee with weed talk show. I talk show with myself, you know, when you need an expert opinion you have to ask yourself.
The best part is that the show is in English and Portuguese, just like the punk rock songs for kids. Therefore today I am launching my cover song in Portuguese called a barata (the cockroach).
So be a Punk, ambrase your assholeness and shine were the light doesn’t shine. I choose religion for many reasons, but most because they are the first ones to fail in reconize souls and our uniqueness. Ironic, right? Because they sure preach about it, but actions speaks lauder than words.