Chapter 10: Now what?

Do you know the greatest difficulty of depression? Is to be seen. When I first starting doing therapy I didn’t know how big of a shit I was in. I knew it was big, but no idea it was that big. That is what she said by the way.

Here is the thing, what makes us humans is our emotions and our ability to feel it and express. When I first started therapy I knew something was wrong, and hearing that I was depressed meant nothing, because I was emotionally numb. Therefore, I need to learn how to feel and learn my emotions again. Once I did that I started to understand how big the shit was.

Once I accepted that I was depressed I realized that it was about my existence, my feelings. Just like the song walking contradiction; “I have no belief but I believe I am walking contradiction and I have no right.” That is how it felt, like I had no right to feel how I felt, not even if was causing me harm. Now what makes it harder is when you finally accept and tell people you were depressed most people think is bullshit. They think that because is something invisible and in my case I was a good actor pretending everything was fine. Kind of like on that movie Anger Management with Adam Sandler.

Now the opposite of Anger is Joy and there is nothing more fun than learn and play these songs. I believe that feelings are our super power as humans, because they guide us and life is how you feel. So, now that I got my power back I can say “Don’t fuck with my feelings”. Learning how to sing, play, write (blog and book), write punk songs for kids is such a big metaphor for me, like I am gaining really gaining my super powers back (voice). That feels really good, like I can finally love myself and rise out of the depression that I was in for a long time. Like the Religious heaven boring and all the same and what is worst, in a bad neighborhood since you need to go through the gates of heaven.

Now is time to raise hell because isn’t a bad place, and now that I got my power back nobody messes with my feelings, neither with my kids feelings. Not even God (per Religion), because the truth is people might never understand how music makes me feel, the same way on how marijuana doesn’t numb my feelings it just amplifies, the same way music does. Now, I don’t give a shit of what people think. However, I do care about children that is why is important to teach them not to sell their soul.

Punkaste,

Rirou

Listen up here, I’ll make it quite clear
I’m gonna put some boogie in your ear
Shake and bop, don’t you stop
Dance like a maniac until you drop I don’t mind, I don’t mind
I can run a razor right up your spine
What are you waiting for?
What do you think you were created for? Show us, you care, show us you dare
You don’t know what happened if you weren’t there Born to raise hell, born to raise hell
We know how to do it and we do it real well
Born to raise hell, born to raise hell
Voodoo medicine, cast my spell
Born to raise hell, born to raise hell
Play that guitar just like ringin’ a bell Take it or leave it Going for broke, rock ’til you choke
It don’t matter if you drink or smoke
Speak through the beat, get up on your feet
Sweating like a hound dog, white as a sheetDon’t you be scared, don’t you be scared
Everybody terrified, it don’t seem fair
What are you waiting for?
What do you think you were creating for Out of your seat, blind in the heat
Do the nasty boogie mama, stomp your feet Born to raise hell, born to raise hell
We know how to do it and we do it real well
Born to raise hell, born to raise hell
Go back to zero, take a pill and get well
Born to raise hell, born to raise hell
Be a good soldier and die where you fell Born to raise hell, born to raise hell
We know how to do it and we do it real well
Born to raise hell, born to raise hell
Go on out and boogie ’cause you never can tell Born to raise hell, born to raise hell
Be a good soldier and die where you fell
Born to raise hell, born to raise hell
We know how to do it and we do it real well

Rocker Dad concept

Here is today’s video of how the whole Rocker Dad concept started after a big breakthrough in Rirou’s therapy session.

Remember to check it out Rirou’s very first Punk Rock song for kids!

Punkaste,

Rirou

Day 40 of 40 – Rocker Dad

Last year in the week Rirou turned 39 years old he told my family that I wanted to be a stay home Dad. But I also wanted to be a:

  • Life coach
  • Rock Star
  • T-shirt Designer
  • The Pope of his own religion

With therapy Rirou realized that he was to Punk to be all of that, except T-shit designer, he have some sick unfashion designs. However, his ideas were pretty funny. So, Rirou created a concept to compete with the soccer moms; The Rocker Dad, but Rirou is a punk by nature so he still created his own religion and became the Pope (a story that started when he was 7 years old). He also became the opposite of every life coach out there, he is selling some sick T-shirts, created his own diet, but most important Rirou made a comedy YouTube channel, and he is creating punk songs for kids. So, here we are!

Next week this blog will start the story from the begging, so coming soon the first part of Star Punks: Not another hero!

Feel Good,

Rirou

Day 39 of 40 – The art of Looking good naked

Looking good is matter of being comfortable in your own skin. Rirou have had a hard time with that for a long time. For a long time he could not even look at his own eyes in the mirror. It did not matter how many affirmations he did, how many diets, or how much exercise he did. He did not look good naked. When Luke was born everything changed, Rirou needed to accept himself and feel good about himself if he wanted his kids to feel that way.

Rirou notice the more he played the guitar and did his art the better he felt, and the better he looked good naked. Meaning he could actually look at himself in the mirror. Not only that, he could look in the mirror and say I love you out loud. Even looking like Chewbacca, that is how he describes himself after he stop shaving his body, after all, he was no longer a triathlete, therefore no need to shave. Sorry that is too much information but it’s part of the process.

Since life is a mirror game, he notice the better he felt the better Luke felt. For Rirou it was clear, everything is connected, and starts with you and how you feel. That is when the Rocker Dad project came along…. The punk side you probably already notice, the attitude, and tomorrow the rocker Dad will rise.

Feel Good,

Rirou

Day 36 of 40 – Roots Bloody Roots

Friday April 17th Rirou’s walk through the COVID-420 quarantine is coming to his final day, but who is Rirou after all?

In his daily meditation he often ask “who am I?, am I Rirou or Rirou is me?” During his meditations he found out that Rirou is a disturbed modern cavemen, he learned how to suppress his emotions in Portuguese, but learned how to express them in English. The result of that is a glitch in his matrix, making Rirou even more disturbed.

Rirou wanted to punk the world with a really disturbed idea. Rirou learned that in order to make any change he needed get to the root of the issue. In therapy is well known that in order for healing to happen, we must heal our inner child, and that is what is all about, but why?

Well, the meaning of life is to look good naked which simply means being conformable in your own skin. Rirou realized in order to teach his kids to look good naked he needed to look good naked himself. Is like the song from Rirou favorite Offspring album, “Way down the line”, in that song the lyrics says “Nothing changes cause its all the same… there is a chain there is never broken…”. Rirou wanted to break that chain, because he knows it that you can’t pour from an empty cup and in order to empower his kids to look good naked he needed to do that same.

Rirou decided to fight the evil forces that made him feel like an asshole. Yes, he became the pope of his own Religion and created “The not so fashion show” to spread his wisdom worldwide. Rirou is either a genius or totally insane, but he knows one thing for sure, he is extremely disturbed….Rirou is simply Richard higher self, no pun intended…

To be continued!

Feel Good,

Rirou

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