Day 34 of 40 – The thin line between love and hate

Wednesday April 15th, Rirou woke up that day thinking what he was going to talk in therapy. Rirou had gone to therapy last week and he thought he didn’t have much to talk about it, so the day went by as usual.

About one year ago Rirou arrived home from therapy and for the first time he was in a good mood after a therapy session. He arrived with his air guitar with the best “Angus Young” moves he knows. That is Rirou’s trademark at home, the “Angus Young” air guitar. Of course everyone looked confused, so he looked to the family and “I found my calling I joined a band”. They look even more confused because he did not know how to play the guitar neither how to sing. Maybe it is a midlife crisis after all. But Rirou completed, don’t worry is a school of Rock program, I gonna learn how to play and sing for fun and that was an instant relief.

Let’s be honest, what are the chances of becoming a rock star at 40? Not impossible, but it is very small. Plus, that was not the goal. In fact, it was not about making money or being famous. It was all about his soul, and that is how he started therapy that day.

Rirou told his therapist what he was doing and what he wanted to do, and he said “it’s not about the money”; she replied, “is about what then?” Rirou simply said is about how I feel. When she asked, and how you feel? Rirou answered so fast and automatically like it was not even him talking. It is crazy how the subconscious mind works. Rirou simple replied: “Like an asshole”. Right at that moment, Rirou’s matrix collapsed.

Rirou love art but the problem is that the art that he loves dearly is considered offensive for many, and in his subconscious mind he truly believed that he was an asshole and a sinner. After all, that is what he was thought his entire life.

Rirou look to his therapist, and simply said: “This is fucked up. I am fucked” and both laugh. “It is all in his mind” he said “I need to do something if I want my kids to feel worth it.” Rirou stayed quite for a few minutes crying, and he said “My Dad said I could be anything that I want, so I will become the biggest asshole. The biggest asshole by not being an asshole with myself anymore. I need to save me from myself. Is time to fire my guns!”

Rirou’s favorite song to air guitar

To be continued…

Feel Good,

Rirou

Day 23 of 40 – The meaning of life

Day 23rd of Rirou’s COVID-19 isolation and his is things were getting clear by the day in his matrix, while the collective matrix was still a mess. Rirou was finally understanding his higher purpose, and that it’s what was missing in Rirou’s life. After Luke was born Rirou had a clear picture in his mind of the meaning of life, he now just needed a higher purpose.

Luke’s favorite song in the womb!

After coaching for so many years and so many different types of athletes, Rirou realized that all of them have the same goal of “Looking good naked”, including Rirou. After awhile Rirou realized that looking good naked was much more than just the mind and the body thing. Looking good naked was about how you feel when you look in the mirror and how you feel when you go lay down in bed.

Back in 2003 Rirou made an option for his life, the option of laying down in bed at night with a clear conscious. That is the main reason why Rirou did not take any drugs during his athlete career, and the reason why Rirou quit business school; he saw too much corruption on the low level and the highest level, that he did not want to be part of it. Rirou has always being a punk and he did not tolerate bullshit, and the older he gets the ability to tolerate get lower exponentially.

Back in 2013 Rirou’s crisis was more about the body, since he made the option in 2003 that he would sleep with a clear conscious he was feeling much better. In 2013 he had achieved his dream body with 160 pounds and 6% body fat, but he still didn’t feel like he looked good naked. So, Rirou went into a new revolution that went all the way up to 2018 when he ran to the hills. Rirou accepted his body.

Back 2016 Rirou did not have a crisis, he had an spiritual awakening that Luke brought to him. Luke brought Rirou something that no life coach, no religion, no parent, could have giving him, only a child can give, after all children are the biggest teachers in life.

Rirou finally realized the true meaning of looking good naked, and its about mind, body and soul. Looking good naked is the ability to feel good in your own skin!

Rirou is a moonchild and he believes in being the change he wishes to see in the world, and since the meaning of life is to look good naked; which is totally related to how you feel about yourself. Rirou, as a master punk, decided to get something that made him feel bad for years (Religion) and make one that is the complete opposite, a religion based on JOY! The collective matrix was going to an existential crisis with the COVID-19, so now was the perfect time to start writing about it.

Rirou was no longer a procrastinator, and now he was finally fulfilling his prophecy. He finally looking good naked.

Feel Good

Rirou

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