Chapter 7: The punk in me honors the punk you

The day of this picture was the day my eyes open after Luke was born. I mean, I was blind for awhile due to the light Luke brought to me. That day was also the same day Luke opened his eyes physically also the day he flipped everybody off. I mean he was on planet earth for 19 days and all we did was test after test to figure it out what was going on. That was the day things started to change and I understood as: He is fine, he just needs love like any other child in the world.

From that point on my wife and I said enough testing, let’s just wait for more results to come and start seeing what we need to do take him home, taking him out to see the sun, take him to the beach, take him skateboarding, start living in general. We started to work on getting out of the hospital. In other words, we said let him shine and see what support he needs.

Feeling that Luke was fine helped me keep going within and keep working on my healing, he actually speed up the process. That was my promise to myself, I did not want to pass on my baggage to my kids. Luckily, that was not my first transformation, so I knew what I needed to do. In order to change anything you must first destroy the old and that is what I did, something I call anarchy with a discipline of an ironman. I didn’t think twice, and I decided to fully retire form racing and only coach. That felt really good.

I started to build the new or what I thought was the new, but the universe was sending me another way and little by little I started to lose my clients. Until one day my coaching deal with LA Fitness ended out of nowhere. So, we decided to move to Colorado. I tried a to do the same old story, go back to school but that was not it either. I was still confused, so I found a therapist in Colorado and restarted my therapy sessions.

This time therapy were really intense, since I was getting into the core of the issue of my depression. I mean, up to know I have used physical pain (ironman), and it help however it was not healing. I was just a slave of pain. For me, all we need is Love, so I needed to Love myself and that means embrace and accept my inner punk. I knew what I needed to do was to heal my inner child, I was still angry inside. For me that was only one option: I needed to make that air guitar become real. I needed learn how to play my favorite songs in the guitar, that was my goal when I got the guitar before Luke was born. Yeah, those same songs that I always heard it was taking me to hell.

I started to play and since I always wanted to do some non-profit and something the brings change, I was looking for something that could unite both. With time my mission started to make sense, and again the universe made his move and put me in inside a preschool classroom. I did the first year of preschool with Luke as his nurse cause she quit in the 1st month. There I realized that kids are naturally born punks, they know about love and unity. I mean, seen how Luke rocks and keep asking for fast songs, and seen kids in preschool I am sure kids are born punks! Therefore, we just need to teach them not to sell their soul and embrace their inner punk.

The more I meditate the more insane I become, and I know that I need to fulfill my destiny. I decided to turn my anger into something nice. I realize that if I use the enemy (rock) and start them early I could raise an army of punks. An army of love, and love you know, spreads like fire. Therefore, I could make a real change in world while healing myself. As I learn how to play my favorite “Religious” songs they inspire me to create Punk Rock songs for kids. This way I can change the world one kid at the time…. Some might enjoy, some might not, but remember it’s okay to be different, and love is love.

Punkaste,

Rirou

Day 35 of 40 – Slayer Saves!

Thursday April 16th, Rirou have finally learned how he felt all those years, and a big part that made you feel like an asshole was Religion. A story that started long ago as early as 3 months old when he got baptize, that water made him laugh. He did not understand, but that was a cool bath.

Years later he was the only in the family who refused to do the first communion for the simple fact that the Pope once prohibited his favorite band to play in Chile. Rirou that day called the Pope an asshole for stopping millions of people to enjoy one of the biggest band of all times. That stick with Rirou for a long time….

When Rirou turned 35 years old he decided to unbaptized himself, and later that year he baptized himself by getting a guitar. After Rirou moved to Colorado Slayer came to play their final tour. Rirou had never seen slayer live, and slayer have saved Rirou so many times. Slayer has always been Rirou’s biggest emotional help, every time Rirou needed to lift up his soul Slayer was there.

On august 2018 Rirou watched Slayer and that night his life changed forever. That was Rirou favorite concert EVER! He was so impress, they were so raw, even more than Iron Maiden. Don’t get me wrong Iron Maiden is God, but Slayer live is fucking insane, even faster than normal.

That night was full moon and the energy was amazing. When Slayer played “Read between the lies”, there is a part in the lyrics that says “There is no heaven without a hell”, at that moment Rirou had a huge deja-vu.

Rirou knew it that was a sign, after all in one interview Tom Arraya (Slayer singer and bass player) once said, “Deja-vu is a sign that you are in the right path”. That day Rirou have made his first YouTube video about Rock. Rirou had find out he was an artist, it was in his face all the time, and his art was making people feel good. That was the essence of his old coaching business, after all the slogan was “Train Smart, Feel Good, Race Faster”.

After the show Rirou got in his mini van (the only one in the parking lot) and while driving home he was thinking how fucking awesome that concert was. That was literally the best concert of his LIFE, and he still did not understand how people could say that was a bad thing (yes even in 2020). And how could one go to hell for simply enjoying art? During the drive back home listening to Slayer Rirou knew it that he needed to do something about it, he needed to heal…

April 16th is the day after tax day, and Rirou had closed his old coaching business forever and only kept his non profit organization, and decided to pursue his destiny by talking about this stuff. Rirou claims he is a “comedian in the closet”, and it was time to come out. In order to share his art Rirou became the Pope of his own Religion… This is either saving him from hell or taking to hell first class. Now in the final days of Rirou’s walk through COVID-420 isolation he was organizing how he would share his wisdom; The ways of the punk!

To be continued…

Feel Good,

Rirou

PS: Thank you Slayer your art truly changed my life!

The video I made that day…

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