Chapter 1 – So os loucos sabem/ “Only madmen know”

Today is father’s day in Brazil and since I am an amerioca, a mix of american with carioca, I decided to launch my fatherhood blog. Carioca is someone that is from Rio de Janeiro, which is my home town, and that explains the statue with my face on it. That being said, let’s go by part.

I wrote a few things in this blog before, but once I read back again I notice it was quite confusing, just like the way I was. I am not going to lie, the last few years were hard and confusing but once I turned 40 things started to make more sense to me. However, this confusion started way back in 2004 when my soul searching started.

So who is Rirou? Well, Rirou is simply Richard Wygand soul. I can say that in 2016 when Luke was born I found my soul, but once I found I did not know what to do. Those 4 years were intense, with lots of changes and raw primal emotions while I was escaping my own matrix, and started to feel good in my own skin. Now that we know that I no longer need to speak in the 3rd person, because Rirou is me.

So why I considered myself a punk? Well, like I said before punk is about attitude. The reality is I was always different, meaning I was always the sensitive boy, the radical, the weirdo or the crazy one. The truth is, I just had different view of life, I did not wanted to go to college, I did not want to be rich or famous. I just wanted to be happy. When I turned 19 I started to try to fit in, get in college and have a “normal” life. However, a few years later this process was crushing my soul to a point that I didn’t even know who I was still alive. In fact, I was totally numb inside. In 2004 the situation was unsustainable that I started therapy and decided to pursue what made my soul happy. I started to do Ironman because the physical pain was helping my emotional pain, and that felt really good. This attitude for me is being a punk, it simply means do what makes your soul feel good. This is exactly what I want to teach my kids, is to be who they are and share their light what makes their soul feel good, and only the crazy ones know that. That is why is this post have this tittle, which is a song from one of my favorite bands in Brazil.

This past Thursday, I was asked to give a mini testimonial on what it means to be a Dad for a show in Brazil, which made me realized this would be the perfect kick off for my blog. Also, since I have another kid coming, a girl this time, and is bringing a lot of memories I decided to the recap my fatherhood story with my clear mind. I actually separate the things a little bit, I made an YouTube channel for the kids Punk Rock songs that I am creating. And another channel where I do cover of my favorite songs with video clips of me relearning how to skateboard at the age of 40, and the crazy things I do with my kids.

Here is the video of my testimonial and what I think it means to be a Dad. The video is in Portuguese but I did my best to put subtitles.

Punkaste,

Rirou

Song: So of loucos sabem:

Lyrics translated:

Now I know exactly what to do
Good start, be able to count on you
Cause I remember everything brother
I was there too
A man when at peace
Don't want war with anyone
I held my tears
Because I didn't want to show the emotion
Since I was just there to watch
And learn a little more about perception
They say it's impossible to find love
Without losing reason
But for those who have strong thoughts
The impossible is only a matter of opinion
And that crazy people know
Only madmen know
That the crazy know
Only madmen know
All positivity I wish you
Because we need it in the days of struggle
The fear follow our dreams
The fear follow our dreams
Beautiful girl, I want to live on your street
You missed
You missed
I want to see you again
I want to see you again
You missed
Now I know exactly what to do
I'll start over, be able to count on you
Cause I remember everything brother
I was there too
A man when at peace
Don't want war with anyone

August 9, 2020 0

Chapter 1- Moonchild

It was 15 min to midnight during the winter solstice in the south hemisphere of the planet earth, the moon was waxing gibbous when Rirou, the punk, was born. Rirou is considered a sensitive soul, or what many call nowadays an empath personality. Rirou has always been fascinated by the moon, since little he always looked up to the for answers. Somehow he feels he is related to the moon, but mostly the dark side of the moon, that is why he considered himself a moonchild.

Rirou had a passion for heavy metal music, he loved Iron Maiden and guitars, specially air guitars. He also loved skateboarding, and according to family history he was on top of the skateboard at around 2 years old. Around 7 years old he got an vinyl as present, but it was a kids music vinyl, so he exchanged to an ACDC vinyl, the fly on the wall. He loved the fact bee ass on the back of the vinyl.

Rirou has always being a punk, and around 12 years old he called the Pope an asshole for not allowing Iron Maiden to play in Chile. Rirou started to get angry, because he did not understand how a man could determinate who could or not enjoy something. That made him sad, and made him cry many times.

Also as a sensitive soul Rirou did not really understood many things that he felt, since that some of those feelings were not necessarily his. According to studies empath can feel the energy and emotions around them, and with Rirou was not different. And that made him cry even more. How much he cried? A lot, in fact, he cried so much that everyone sang this song to him:

Rirou, like many other kids, was thought that boys didn’t cry, and that he needed to swallow his feelings. He needed to be a man, a “real man.” Well, he did exactly that, he started to swallow his feelings, and he started to numb them with food. Instead of crying, talking or even accessing his feelings he started to eat, and that started a whole new set of issues.

Rirou started to feel really bad about himself, because the music he loved dearly was considered the devil music, and skateboarding was considered a crime, even though those things made him feel good. They made him feel alive, but everything else around him said the opposite. So he started to think that everything was wrong with him, and that he was not allowed to feel good.

Rirou started to eat compulsively, and within a few years he was having weight issues so, besides “being a sensitive kid”, he was now the “chubby sensitive child”. By 13 years old Rirou was completely numb and started shaving his head totally opposite of what he wanted (he wanted long hair like the maiden guys). Confused Rirou started to started dieting after he read the book “So e gordo quem quer”, which the translation is “You are only fat because you want”. He also started to exercise insanity, sometimes 3 times a day and he started to become obsessed with his body imagine, and that is when he joined a basketball team…

To be continued.

Punkaste,

Rirou

June 12, 2020 0

Day 36 of 40 – Roots Bloody Roots

Friday April 17th Rirou’s walk through the COVID-420 quarantine is coming to his final day, but who is Rirou after all?

In his daily meditation he often ask “who am I?, am I Rirou or Rirou is me?” During his meditations he found out that Rirou is a disturbed modern cavemen, he learned how to suppress his emotions in Portuguese, but learned how to express them in English. The result of that is a glitch in his matrix, making Rirou even more disturbed.

Rirou wanted to punk the world with a really disturbed idea. Rirou learned that in order to make any change he needed get to the root of the issue. In therapy is well known that in order for healing to happen, we must heal our inner child, and that is what is all about, but why?

Well, the meaning of life is to look good naked which simply means being conformable in your own skin. Rirou realized in order to teach his kids to look good naked he needed to look good naked himself. Is like the song from Rirou favorite Offspring album, “Way down the line”, in that song the lyrics says “Nothing changes cause its all the same… there is a chain there is never broken…”. Rirou wanted to break that chain, because he knows it that you can’t pour from an empty cup and in order to empower his kids to look good naked he needed to do that same.

Rirou decided to fight the evil forces that made him feel like an asshole. Yes, he became the pope of his own Religion and created “The not so fashion show” to spread his wisdom worldwide. Rirou is either a genius or totally insane, but he knows one thing for sure, he is extremely disturbed….Rirou is simply Richard higher self, no pun intended…

To be continued!

Feel Good,

Rirou

May 22, 2020 0